Decisions
by notsoinnocentfangirl
Summary: Everyone needs to start making their own decisions eventually. Merlin feels as if it's time for Arthur to do just that, but Arthur believes that he has been doing that all along. Care to find out which one of them is right? Slight AU. Merlin/Arthur.


_**A/N: So this kinda sucks, I know. Lol. But I had this school assignment in Creative Writing where I had to write a dialogue based fic (hence the reason why there's so much dialogue, you'll see) and the whole time I was writing it, I pictured Merlin and Arthur (for the school assignment I used no names, just descriptions) So I decided to tweak it up a bit, add some names, and some (slight) romance, and wa-la, I bring you a new, crappy fic. Hope you read it anyways. **_

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing. **_

_**Warning: This is…. slight AU-ish. It's kinda obvious. I mean, it's SO slight that you can ignore it, but it's there, since while I was writing it I wasn't picturing Camelot and princes and all, but two friends talking.**_

_**Dedications: To chorus, whose been very patiently waiting for me to post something he'd actually read.**_

_**Decisions**_

Two men, one with dark black hair and the other with hair as golden as the sun, sit beside a lake on a cold, foggy morning. The weather leaves nothing to be desired aside from each other's company.

"You really have to start making your own decisions, you know," the dark haired man, Merlin, says, beginning a conversation that he has been too afraid to start before now. He tries his best to sound firm.

His lighter haired friend, Arthur, looks at him in surprise. "I do."

"No you don't. You allow your father's opinion and desires to cloud your judgment and guide your own desires."

"I do not!" Arthur protests, sounding defensive now. There's a spark in his clear, blue eyes that warns his friend that in this moment he is treading on dangerous ground.

Merlin ignores this warning and keeps talking. "You allow your father's expectations to rule your life."

Arthur begins to protest once more before shutting his mouth. He bites his lip softly before looking down at the ground, avoiding the bluish-grey gaze that belongs to his best friend. "Do you really believe that?"

"Sadly," Merlin says, frowning slightly, "I do."

"But…."

"I'm sorry," he says, sounding as if he really is. "I'm not trying to hurt your feelings, or cause a rift between us. You should know that I'm not. I'm only telling you this because it's important. You have to start living life for yourself, not for your father. I don't want you to keep doing what he wants just so that…."

"I do make my own decisions," Arthur says, cutting into the other man's speech. His protest sound feeble to his own ears and he pouts.

"Name one time that you have," the darker haired of the two says. He pauses, biting his lip softly. "One time that doesn't involve food or women…."

"I chose to be friends with you, even when my father told me not to," his friend says, sounding smug as he interrupts him once more.

"Or me," Merlin continues, looking at his friend sadly.

"But why can't I name you," Arthur asks, sounding genuinely confused now. "I thought that was what this whole conversation was about. You know…. About you… and what you want…."

The dark haired man makes a small sound of distress. "Of course this isn't about me. Have you even been listening to me? This is about you, and what you need to do…"

"And about what you want me to do," the lighter haired man says, fighting the urge to smile affectionately.

"No… this isn't… I don't want you to do anything. Really, I just want…." Merlin stops talking, flailing around as he tries to find the right words.

"It's always about you though, even when you try your hardest to make it not be," Arthur says, grasping his friend's thin, bony shoulder.

"I'm not important," Merlin says, sounding anxious now. "I don't matter…."

"You do to me," Arthur says, trailing his hand downward to grab a hold of one of his friend's slender, shaking ones. "You always have."

"We're getting off subject," Merlin says, trying to pull away from his friend's grasp.

Arthur shakes his head. "No. I believe that we're right on subject."

"But… we were talking about you making your own decisions. And now you're talking about me. This isn't about me. This is…"

"Why do you want me to make my own decisions," Arthur asks.

"So that you can be happy," his friend answers immediately.

Arthur smiles. "I am happy."

"I don't want you ending up like your father," Merlin tells him, shuddering a bit at the mere thought. "I'm afraid that if you keep doing what he wants, and living your life by his rules and his standards, that you'll end up as cold and vengeful and uncaring as he is."

"You don't want to lose me," his friend says, sounding a bit cocky now.

"I…."

"You don't want me to change."

"Of course I don't," the dark haired man says.

His friend grins at him. "You should stop worrying so much."

Merlin huffs. "You're so annoying. I'm serious. You have got to start making decisions for yourself."

"I do, all the time."

"When?" Merlin asks.

"Every time I chose to spend time with you."

"That…."

"Don't tell me it doesn't count," the lighter haired man says, squeezing his friend's hand. "Because it does. Every decision I make that pertains to you, I make it on my own. I don't think of my father when I decide to do something with you, or when I decide to tell you something or to spend my time with you. I only think of myself, and well… of you. And they always wind up being the most important decisions in my life. And they always make me the happiest too."

"I still think…"

"That I should stop listening to my father and live for myself," Arthur says, grinning softly. "Yes, I know that this is what you think. Don't worry though. I don't let my father decide things for me nearly as much as you think."

The dark haired man bites his lip again. "I'm not sure we're on the same page here."

"Then you should get on whatever page that I'm on, because I'm right," Arthur tells the younger boy.

"Oh, does that mean that I'm wrong then," Merlin asks.

"But of course you are," Arthur says, laughing softly.

"How do you figure," his friend asks.

"Because you say that I need to start making more decisions for myself, and I do.

"But…"

"Just shut up," the lighter haired man says. "Really, just shut up." He laughs, leaning forward to spontaneously kiss Merlin as the other boy continues to babble. He pulls away as Merlin looks at him, a shocked expression etched out on his pale face. Arthur's grin softens into a fond smile. "You worry too much. I'm not going to end up like my father."

Merlin blinks, raising a hand to touch his lips. He still looks a bit stunned. He seems to shake himself out of it enough to ask one thing though. "Are you sure?" He's no fully certain if he's asking about Arthur's statement or his actions.

The lighter haired man nods. "Yes," he says, leaning forward to kiss the darker haired boy once more.

"But…. how."

Arthur shuts him up by firmly placing his own lips over Merlin's, kissing him softly.

He grins as he pulls away, taking in Merlin's flushed cheeks and dazed looking eyes. "Because I've decided to always keep you around so that you can make sure of it yourself," he says, and that one statement can easily answer both of Merlin's questions. Because really, it's all a matter of Merlin being there, with Arthur, and when they are together, there is no reason to question or doubt or have any fear.

The dark haired man huffs though, pretending to be put out. "Fine. Whatever. There really isn't any point of trying to have a mature conversation with you."

"Nope," the lighter haired man says, laughing softly. "And I hereby decide that you should stop trying." He kisses Merlin again, tangling a hand into his friend's dark hair, and Merlin sighs softly, melting into him.

The darker haired man groans when they separate, bringing the hand that Arthur isn't holding up to smack the head of golden hair. "Idiot."

Arthur just laughs, kissing him again, fleetingly this time, and pulls him up from where they were sitting. "Come on. Time to get breakfast. And I get to decide what we're having. You said I have to start deciding things on my own, after all."

The dark haired man glares at his friend as he gets dragged along." You're such a prat."

The lighter haired man grins broadly. "Yup. And it's my own decision to be one."

_**A/N: So what do you all think? Crappy right? I'm sorry :( Anyways…. Lol, I gotta go do homework now. **_

_**Please review.**_


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